Thursday, November 30, 2006

3 hours ahead again

It was another disappointment after realising the passenger next to me was not a hot chick. In fact, it was not even a chick.
I sighed that I needed to spend another 7 hours sitting next to an old wrinkly man on my flight back to Melbourne.
It was then I realised in awe, that seat 65F on QF10 departing from Singapore, was my 18th flight of the year.
Then again, why couldn't I sit next to a hot chick?!
Half an hour into the flight, I became forgiving. Maybe the old man was disappointed as well. Maybe he was expecting some hot hootchi mama to be squirming down the seat beside him.
I felt guilty. I wished I could've developed some saggy breasts to make his day. But you know, life's like that.

Did I mention that my graduation robe is in pink? Yea, the kind of pink that makes you wonder who in the right mind would possibly include that in the colour selection of graduation robes. The kind of pink that will make the girls in my course giggle. The kind of pink that will make the pink panther look straight. The kind of pink that makes me wanna not graduate.
The kind of pink that makes me wanna cry.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Operation pain

The best 2 hours of my life, was on the day before I'm leaving for Melbourne:

10.28am
Bah Kut Teh with my sister in law's family.
11.35am
Drove to Bukit Tinggi with my sister in law and her sister to Bukit Tinggi for hawker food for chicken rice, fried kuey teow, wonton noodles, prawn noodles, and mee hoon kuey.
11.40am
Slight shower
12.10pm
Drove to Mars Baru to share 2 plain roti's, 1 roti egg, 1 roti bomb, and 1 roti banana.
12.30pm
My brother sent the sister and his husband to the hotel while I met up with my friends. I had coffee, some toasted bread, more fried kuey teow and some 'loh' mee hon kuey.

It was pretty fun.

Did I mention I went to the massage of hell later? Yea, and I took away more Halal fries and filet o'fish from McDonald's.
That was roughly 5.30pm.
And then we had dinner at 8pm again.

Sorry, children of Africa.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Jack Bauer can go fly kite

After this wedding, I can say that 24 is full of shit. With the time Jack went on saving the world and fighting Mongolians with bio hazard weapons, I could only manage a wedding with my family.
Well, there wasn't much screw ups. To start with, I think most people liked my speech although half of them can't understand Mandarin. Well, chinky ching chong to you too.

I guess the highlight of the whole week would be the night before. My mom had her sister to perform these Chinese ritual thing. Praying to the God of Heavens(when the direction was clearly the living room fan) and such.
Apparently the parents of both my brother and his wife needed to join the rituals as well. Well, it was something new to everyone.
What they didn't know, or remember, is that the bride's mom is a Catholic. And she's NEVER knelt in her whole life.
Looking back it sounded ridiculous, but everyone saw the face of the mother when she got up. But it was an awkward moment since the crowd kinda got the idea.
The best part was, I was asleep in the corner.
Yup, you heard me. So you can imagine at one side of the house there's this big crisis, and you have the guy's brother passing out on the sofa on the other.

Nevertheless, I enjoyed other parts of the week: driving my sister in law's family to Klang to show them the Indian she-males.
Observing the relatives that stayed at my place: At one stage there's this lacy underwear hanging on the basin. It turned into a huge grandma parachute the next day.
Pretending to be busy: You just sweat a lot, look left and right, and move faster than normal. People won't disturb you that way.
Making fun of the relatives, especially the ugly ones. That's the only way we stayed sane through out the whole event.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Maybe we are better than you

The interesting about home, is that your fancy English is useless if you can't convey the message.
As a ritual thing, I was queing up in the local McDonald's for the Halal fries. Personally I think they taste alright.
Then this girl with thick lips and blue mascara walked up to the cashier and said: Jily and Tohmado.
The cashier gave her packets of chili and tomato sauces.
Jily. and. Tohmado.
We've reached a stage which we've shorten the English language to increase the efficiency of communication.
There's no need for 'May I have some chili and tomato sauce, please?' That's like 9 words. Takes up too much time.
And the wonderful part is, the cashier understood what she wanted. The communication module worked.

And an insight to what's hot in Malaysia:

Friday, November 24, 2006

About wedding

While I was having a dream about bunnies in bikinis this morning, my brother tapped me on my shoulder and woke me up.
He told me that before coming home, he had a project in Auckland. It was an extension of a garage.
It was the smallest job his firm ever accepted. But they fucked it up. The car couldn't get in. The measurements went wrong.
The ceiling was dripping, they had to drill a hole through the living room upstairs, the project went over budget for $50,000.
City council might be suing the firm.
"The thing is", he said, "I'd rather be back in Auckland dealing with all that shit right now, than to walk out of this room to face this wedding this coming Sunday."

We then went out for breakfast.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Home and away

It's more difficult to jog in Klang. I don't know, maybe it's the humidity. Or the heat. Or the fact that I didn't warm up.
Anyway, I just came back from Roti Bomb and Rojak Mee in case you're wondering what I've done today.
Someone told me the other day that Malaysia's ranked 2nd last in terms of recycling efficiency.

WHAT. RECYCLING?

How the hell can we recycle when we don't even know HOW to dispose of our normal rubbish properly?
I thought of that then, and being home now reinforces it. It's like asking for organic vegetables when we don't even have food.
The most common place we dispose of our garbage, without fail, is under the sign 'DO NOT LITTER'.

Anyway. The wedding is going to be awesome. Awesome as in no one, I repeat, NO ONE has any idea what's going on.
I'm practising my smile in case everything goes ape shit. And I like how my mom goes 'guest list?' when we asked her about it.
Stay tuned. I might survive to tell the story.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Bodyrock



A couple of friends've been sharing their awesome experience in the recent U2 concert (namely Regine and Jeannie).
That just reminded me of the ONLY concert I've been to in Melbourne: Moby in The Palace, St Kilda last year.
Fine, the quality was shit. But you can sorta imagine how close Satomi and I were to the stage and the speakers.


This clip below, was the original Bodyrock video in 1999. Way before whatever Idol. Way better dance moves as well.
Made me laugh. I think there are 2 other versions, one featuring the winner of this audition. YouTube it up.

I'm leaving Melbourne until she calms down

At some point of my life I've lost the ability to feel excited.
My brother's getting married on Sunday, yet I am not looking forward to it at all. X mentioned that I should be since I've got only one brother, and wedding is a once in a lifetime celebration.
I begged to differ. I cannot be sure that it's his ONLY wedding. In fact, who's to say that I won't have a second brother to come? (eeeww.)

You know how in movies they always say: "Oh? Today's my birthday? I've completely forgotten about it!" whenever they throw a surprise party? Yea, I always thought it's full on bullshit.
But today, if not for that someone who sent me an advanced birthday message(you know who you are), I'd have really forgotten about Saturday for that moment.
See what I'm talking about? The disability of excitement.
Or, maybe. Maybe I'm just pretending to be not excited so this reverse psychology thing will generate more care and concern.

Who do you think I am? A Singaporean?

This is either going to be the best wedding/worst birthday ever, or the worst wedding/ best birthday ever.

p/s: what is wrong with today's weather? I've never seen such a cloudy and windy day yet the thermostat said 36 degrees C. The wind is blowing nothing but heat and dirt, but I've seen 3 girls with 'upskirt' incident. Don't worry, they didn't see me. Can you imagine how awkward it'd be, realising that the wind's blown your skirt up and then finding out that someone just saw the whole thing? Geez.

Monday, November 20, 2006

Color, too.


A follow up to the previous 'balls' TVC. Parky would like this not only because of the score, but the random clown as well.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

We close in 3 minutes sir-AARGH


A touch of button in photoshop and you can create an architectural landscape picture from a photograph.

Sandra's dying on me again.

So I've applied for this other position in an agency right. I've sent in my CV and stuff with my phlog address attached to it.
What I didn't expect, was the creative director to link through my phlog through this actual blog, which if you've paid attention, sound like a whining little girl going loose with the word 'fuck'.
That, or she's just google'd my name. Surprisingly this blog appears 2nd on the search result if you do so.

The good thing about finishing university: Babies don't sleep as well as I do. In fact, I think I sleep longer than babies.

Anyhow, Omar and I were dashing into Borders at 10.57pm to take advantage of their '35% off with 5 books' offer.
It was an interesting experience, picking books within 3 minutes. Paid 30 dollars for 3 books. Great day.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Now that everything's finished, nothing has begun.

Today felt like Friday.
I was running late to take photos of some of my classmates. The sky was raining. And it felt as if the exhibition never happened.
A whole semester's worth of planning and meeting up and arguing and designing and following up and worrying, poof, gone.
And then I had to take photos.
Apparently I'm getting paid by RMIT to take photos of some of the students regarding their final projects.
You can see more of them here. (Due to copyright issue I was advised by lecturer to take it down from my phlog.)

Now that the exhibition's over. I can finally sit down, and bitch. and whine. and throw myself into self pity.
Someone told me that maybe after I've finished everything I'd realised the shit I've been through and start crying.
Someone was right.
Now I feel extremely pissed of how I got treated by LBHK. The fact that my plan is completely ruined.
You know how when you have a plan and you imagine how your life will cruise through according to that plan? Well, fuck that.
And now everyone's giving me sympathy stare telling me 'you'll find a better job' without knowing so and the exhibition reminded me of how difficult it is to get a job and the fact that everyone else is getting offered a job but me because the whole faculty assumed that I don't need a job since I'm going to Hong Kong which I am so totally not and fuck you LBHK for giving me shit which I thought was chocolate and totally stuffed it down my throat and choked on it and the whole world stinks.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Must look for 'sorry trees'.

Added Frost Design to my 1+1=3 list.
The flash site is fawesome.
Fucking awesome.

Try not to laugh.


I could only last 0.5 seconds.

Was researching for a great idea had for an ad campaign. Veron and I wanted to look for a dopey looking man.
Keyed in 'ugly man'.
I was paralyzed for 5 minutes.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Sandra

A previous msn chat I've had with Mr.X:

...........

Harvard: so should i still bring to the computer shop?

X: if no detection = hdd got prob.. but you still can boot woh.

Harvard: the hdd part really got big noise.

X: Oh got noise kah? What kind of noise? yiiiiiiiiiii or ka ka ka

Harvard: And can really hear something not spinning through like tak tak tak tak tak..

X: or weeeeeeeeee tak, weeeeeee tak + yiiiiiiii

Harvard: A bit like zak zak zak zak chik chik...


So there you go. 2 world wars, hundreds of revolutions, and a tsunami later, you have two university students discussing the sophisticated 'problem' of a computer hard disc drive.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

The inconvenient truth

Ok, let's start with the conclusion:

I'm not going to Leo Burnett HK anymore.

Now that's established, it would be natural for you to ask the question: Why? Regine might go: BUT WHY??
This would take some time to explain (hence pardon my ignorance towards all the msn messages since yesterday evening):

I was assigned to a group in LB. The group has two creative directors. I shall call them cd A and cd B.
I received a call fro cd A yesterday saying my offer was withdrawn due to a 'policy freeze' of LBHK. In short, they can not hire anyone at the moment. But I'll be put into priority in case of change.
Of course his English was fucking monkey talk and I could only make out: You're fucked. Go suck a dick while you're at it. This is all a bunch of shit coming out of a bull's anus.

With a slight pain in the back I went home and chat with the art director in the same group through messenger.
I asked if he knew about the withdrawal of my offer. I had 2 minutes of silence, and then he told me: cd B wants to talk to you.

Cd B: ... listen. I'm as shocked as you are now. This morning cd A told me that you did not want the job anymore. That's why he's now in the process of hiring his ex-colleague. If you did not ask me about this. I'd still think you quit the job...... (MIND BLOCK)

So there you have it. There are 2 reasons of me not going to LBHK. The short one: The company's experiencing a 'policy freeze'.
And the shorter one: I got fucked.

I'm as disgusted as you are. But probably half as devastated as you imagined I'd be. Well, they're from Hong Kong. What do you expect? I saw that coming from the beginning.
The only consolation I got so far, is that I've got a free trip paid for, and some girls calling me again.
And yea, people do checkout each other's nick name. So to that chap who has: Cheap teapot for sale! on his nick. Don't give up!

Monday, November 06, 2006

Ten reasons you should never run a marathon

Well, for me it's always 'lazy, lazy, lazy' from 1 till 10, some folks on stuff magazine actually compiled a pretty sophisticated list.
Here's my summary:

10. Without proper lubrication, your tshirt and shorts will irritate any body part they come in contact with.
9. The running community posing their religion to you. Their tips, their do's and don'ts, their PR's (personal records) etc.
8. A pair of good shoes aka Asics cost a bomb. Yea, don't forget the three figure application fee and lubes.
7. You have to wear short shorts to inflict the least irritation to your lower hemisphere. Frost bite during winter.
6. Icing-joints. This I don't get.
5. Refueling. Eating or sucking some sort of 'gel' during your run.
4. No beer. In my case, no KFC.
3. Your nipples bleed.
2. You basically run everyday to train.
1. See no.3? Replace 'nipples' with 'penis'.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

FUCK 2.0

I've never felt this heartbroken since... I don't know, I couldn't actually think of any death that hurt me so much.
When I was going to sleep yesterday I still wished her goodnight. "Cool, I'll keep working on this torrent file," she said.
And then this morning, at 7.30am Sandra left me. To be precise, her soul and memory have banished from the face of the earth.
I refuse to admit it when Mr.X confirmed her state of coma: "But.. but, she looks so natural. It's as if she's just hibernating."
Now my last hope is maybe she's just having a concussion. Maybe the surgeons down at La Trobe could give me a second opinion.
And to think I was just talking about lost yesterday, this is just too much for me to handle at the moment.

Update: This morning Sandra miraculously woke up. My emoticons are back! If you have not noticed yet, Sandra is the name of my laptop hard disc drive. I have no idea when she's dying now that she had that coma attack...

Friday, November 03, 2006

Exit from Matrix


Every thing's still here, just not in the same place anymore.

I realised, after going through my past photos, that having chicken pox last year might've been the happiest moment in my life.
Look, I was excused from school; excused from being the entertainment coordinator of something I didn't really want to be a part of; I got to watch DVD's all day; some girl was cooking for me everyday; I had a girlfriend (which at that moment was flirting with my best friend); people sent me flowers and get well cards; I wrote a poem; I finished 3 books; I ate to sleep to eat; I got to ponder on life and make fun of homeless people to kill time.

From then on, everything went crap.

From then on, my mind pretty much went through what I never knew existed: Abandonment, betrayal, confusion, denial, exhaustion, frustration, genocidal... (ok that wasn't true, I just wanted to see how far I can list this alphabetically.)
Although I did recover somehow, I still had to suffer the lost of friends, the lost of time, the lost of home, even the lost of weight.
Of course, you might say that life's fucking awesome after that: trip to Japan, award via London, job offer through Hong Kong.
But what you don't realise, is that during all that traveling, I was actually confirming the change of my life. Little by little.
I have no fucking clue how. But one thing for sure: I can never return to the same mentality during the chicken pox attack.
Hear me, one day if I do make a movie, chicken pox will be a major part of it. It'll be something like In the Mood for Love.

3 months of shit for this?


Hope to see you there.

So I was writing my essay on Wong Kar-Wai at 3am in the morning, having the biggest trouble looking for my reference.
Everything was in my head; everything was on the floor. While I was flipping through pages of reading material with my paper-cut fingers for the word 'China', I realised that was the last essay I'll ever write in my entire life. Yesterday I had my final presentation in university: I'm witnessing the slow death of my student life.
And then this morning we've picked up the posters and invitations of the graduate exhibition happening soon.
It's weird. But I never thought I'd actually feel an impact looking and touching the final product of my own design.
Maybe it's because of all the shit I've gone through just to come up with this theme/ design/ execution. Although on the scale it's way below getting nominated for D&AD or an offer from HK, I actually feel like I've achieved something.
Moral of the story: Never put too much effort into anything. It drastically lowers your standard of judgment.