Monday, April 30, 2007

就在我怀疑买了绑带会不会有机会用的一星期后,我目睹我的调味瓶与我不久前刚买的双层保温茶杯演出一场劲爆的命运交响曲。
发现中指徐徐留下那我久违认不出的红色液体时,庆幸我买了绑带。
我觉得血是很有吸引力的。如果不是脑袋传出痛楚的讯息,我相信我会一直看着它流下去。因为很难相信那是我自个儿身体产生的。

有多久没打破杯子了?

其实并没有实际打破杯子的记忆。一就是我从小太受保护,二就是我福星高照了二十三年。也有三的可能性:是我健忘。
可能是四周无人的关系,我的反应冷静地出奇。杯子破碎后不到五秒钟,我缓缓地扭靠水喉,开始清洗伤口。
当场体会到,一个人住,发生意外时,是没有抱怨的权利和必要的。

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Did you get ANIF'd?


Farted during the 37th bar, someone has.

It's like something a friend of mine told me: He went to watch Star Wars II, which Yoda was in action for the first time.
And then in the cinema, when Yoda was fighting Count Dooku, the audience started cheering: Go Yoda! Go!
In the case of Eminence's A Night in Fantasia, well, it's not really the same, but it gave me the same chill behind the spine.
As you can probably guess, the audience of a Japanese Anime and gaming musical concert would be mainly, yellow.
I could've died on the spot suffocating from the geekiness that Hamer Hall harnessed during ANIF 07.
I bet 80% of them could quote the airship number of ANY Gundam cartoon series. The other 20% were their girlfriends, still figuring out whether to dump them or stay on for the money.
I've been their designer(?) and photographer(?) for 2 years now, this is actually the first concert I've attended.
People aways ignore the photographer, which is a good thing. I got to chat with some VERY disgruntled Melbourne staff member.
And eavesdrop over a couple the Sydney staff boasting how many girls they're dating, (obviously not realising I was there, or maybe that was the point) which I simply can't find the relevance with attending a concert. The concert must've turned them on.
I didn't stay for the composer autographing session. Walked out as soon as I could, which is good, because I got to have a nice chat with the flutist. Is that what you call the flute player, a flutist?

Monday, April 23, 2007

First!

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Malaysia, cintaku


Lots of love on this poster. Mm mm.

You can picture it.
Some producers having this brainstorm in their big boardroom with Plasma TV's attached to the corner of the room.
The guy who failed abstract reasoning in college asks: How can we make an attractive movie? Like, a movie that will grab attention?
The assistant wearing a tight shirt with stripes says: I know! We can collaborate different directors to shoot different short films surrounding a theme, and make it a feature!
The cynical Chinese go: It's been done before.
The assistant: ....what about if we collaborate 18 directors?! They can have 5 minute each! And it will be based in.. (looks at his Vogue magazine) PARIS! ... and it'll be about LOVE! We'll call it 'Paris, I love you', and the title will be in FRENCH!
Chinese: This is crazy.
Boss: I like it. Shoot the damn thing.

And then the assistant got promoted and continued working with the guy without abstract reasoning.
They decided to extend the project and work on 'New York, I love you' and 'Tokyo'. All about love, in different cities.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

I want my money, bitch


Thanks Stephen.

Yippe Kaye

Movies to watch later this year:

The Ex.
Martian Child.
Ocean's 13. (Trailer 2A)
Day Watch.
Transformers.
Live Free or Die Hard. (Trailer G)
The Simpsons movie.
Shrek the Third.

Of course, you have the usual 'I'm not sure but someone will drag me along' kind of movie like Spiderman 3.
You can search for the 7 minute trailer yourself if you're that excited. I only do non mainstream trailers here.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

R.I.P.


When brands surrender to consumer buying power.

I do feel sad.
Not that I'm an avid Nike fan, just that it's a part of the city's identity that's been implanted into my mind for the past 5 years.
Besides, having a Nike at the corner of Bourke/Swanston is definitely much presentable than having a Telstra.
I've never bought anything from Nike Melbourne come to think of it. Maybe just some of the yellow wrist bands to support testicular cancer at $3 each. What? That's still like 0.0004% contribution to their $7.2 million rent ok? You just need to sell another 1.8 million wrist bands, what's so difficult about that?
The sentimental part of me says: Aww.
The anti superbrand part of me says: Ha!
Meanwhile, Phil Knight says: What? How can you call an orgy 'orgy' when the Victoria Secret models aren't coming??!

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Fa fa fa wallet

There's always a point in your life, which you need to choose a path out of two within matter of seconds.
It happened to me an hour ago.
Ok, ctrl + Z. I was on the tram after grocery shopping. I put my wallet on the seat. On my way off the tram I thought: hmm, did I put my wallet on the seat?
When my mind replied 'yes I did put my wallet on the seat' the tram was already on its way to the next stop.
I knew I was pretty fucked.

My groceries weighed 7 kg in total. My bag had my house keys, camera, and for heaven's sake, my diary in it.
The dilemma: either I dump my bags and chase after the tram and risk being homeless, losing a camera, and getting blackmailed, or I go home, cook dinner and lose my identity. (Of course, I can run with the bags but that's just plain dumb.)
Anyhow this post has a happy ending. Not the type you get at the end of a massage, but a happy ending like little red riding hood reunited with her grandma and end up stabbing her 5 years later for the inheritance and ran off with the hunter's lesbian daughter.

Good ol' vintage comics


What my brother shares with me on a Thursday morning.

So this might be a late update, but some of you may know that I saw Geoffrey Rush in the cinema last Friday.
No, I don't mean seeing him as Captain Barbosa on the giant screen with his pet moneky in the upcoming Pirates of the Carribean trailer. (although that did also, happen.)
I mean him sitting there, mortally clothed and accompanied on the front row getting ready to watch a movie.
My point is, that many of us would've seen or brushed pass SOME celebrities through our lives. This sort of stuff happens to me quite often actually. A rough breakdown:
I've seen Lindsay Lohan at some premiere when I was in London as well as walking pass one of the members from Pink Floyd.
While my brother and sister've driving ranged with Alan Tam and Ah Lek, I've seen Ah Lek in Chinatown.
I've walked into Nicholas Tse in the Hong Kong airport. Not to mention taking the same flight with the HK all star celebrity soccer team when I was 10. Most of them'd be dead by now.
Let's look across the 'so what did you do?' 'what were you thinking?' 'did you crazy?' part of all this for a moment.
Of all the star-struckness that I've been through, the biggest impact that I'll never ever forget would probably be when I was 5.
We were in Genting Highlands, watching the 'He-Man' show. Yes, you heard me, He-Man. Master of the Universe, He-Man.
You know, as a kid, He-Man was pretty much the-man. You do not doubt his sexuality even if he's wearing tight leather gears.
What bothered me, was probably the end part of the show. When 'He-Man and his crew' walked around the crowd and shook hands with the audience. I think He-Man shook hands with my sister. And I shook hands with 'that guy in purple who I never remembered seeing or just didn't bother'.
There I was, a 5 year old kid, experiencing the unfairness of life, the impact of probability, and sweaty palms.
Good memories.

Saturday, April 07, 2007

Workless blue


Brushed past the 6.43 train on the way back from work.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Who cares about the Spartans?


Honey, keep your eyes on the road.

Give me one reason why I should look forward to 300 after seeing this picture of the upcoming Transformers movie?
Ok, apart from Megatron looking like a mutated cockroach from A Bug's Life, and the movie not coming out for another 3 months.
This picture still shits all over 300 like an elephant having diarrhea over a chipmunk over a rainy day.
Let's hope Michael Bay doesn't fuck this one up. Optimus might make out with Megatron in the end like Pearl Harbour.

Recessive humour


That's a bad fart, Harry.

While placing my back issue order for the March 07 Vanity Fair issue, I found this in the Q&A section:

All requests for back issues should be sent to subscriptions@vf.com. You can also call 800-365-0635 for issues dating from January 1999. Any other back issues: please go to a chiropractor.

Was that a lame joke? I can't seem to tell anymore. I think it's pretty lame, but I laughed anyway.
Anyhow, Annie Leibovitz did 'the big shoot' in this Hollywood special issue. Totally missed it since I was in Malaysia.

Monday, April 02, 2007

Should you be laughing at this?


Yeehar.


I saw this book in Kinokuniya, Sydney. Decided not to buy it on the first day, only to return the next day to get it and leave a girl unimpressed. (Just found out that she actually likes it and has been returning to Kino to lol about the book. )
I knew it would be useful in a way like how I'm passing the book around in office now. At least people are laughing.
Now I'm just worried if they think I'm an Asian pervert. Because I don't really talk much. And I think most of them are quite shocked to find that the book belongs to me.
Oh well, who says Chinese can't be sick?

More preview of the book at www.shouldyoubelaughingatthis.co.uk

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Behold


I've got internet connection at home.
Photo taken upon Shoh's request for his desktop background.
7 Electric Street, Richmond.