Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Late update

this is the Unilodge photo I was talking about when I was in Sydney.

Best cabin crew huh

Tell me, is it just me, or somehow Malaysia Airlines air stewardess treat malaysians like shit? On my way home I sat beside this Australian couple, and they get better treatment compared to me! The hostess ask them questions politely and speak softly, while she served me with a "nah take it" attitude.
Really, it's sad to be racist, yet to be racist against your own countrymen, now that's fucked up.
I guess, to improve, we have to stop looking up towards the western culture.

Monday, November 29, 2004

Dance of life

I went to see the exhibition of Edvard Munch at the NGV today, despite the fact that I'm leaving Melbourne tomorrow. I mean hey, you only get to see Edvard Munch's real work this once.

If you don't know, he painted The Scream. Yes, that one with the twisting guy holding his cheeks on a wooden bridge.

This Edvard guy is a sad characther. His loved ones died consecutively, starting from his mother when he was a child, then his sister a few years later, then his brother, then his father. His last love affair ended with a fight involving a fire arm and him getting shot on the left arm.

He's kinda fucked up, if you know what I mean.

As an expressionist, his paintings are all messy and bold. I don't particularly like them. I do appreciate the expression/emotion of some of the paintings (like The Scream, and It's so tiny, like A3 size), yet some I think it's just completely 3 year old sketches. Ok, so I do not have the depth of understanding Expressionism. But I'm not going to pretend that I'm high cultured and appreciate what that doesn't please my eyes.

One thing I'm sure, he's a fucking great writer/poet.

"From the moment of my birth, the angels of anxiety, worry, and death stood at my side, followed me out when I played, followed me in the sun of springtime and in the glories of summer. They stood at my side in the evening when I closed my eyes, and intimidated me with death, hell, and eternal damnation. And I would often wake up at night and stare widely into the room: Am I in Hell?"

Anyway, it's $10 well spent.
If you're in Melbourne, go see it. It's on till mid January.
But of course you an always see his paintings on websites like:

Saturday, November 27, 2004

AAARRGH!! - part 2

On my 21st birthday, I received the best present ever.
A $150 tram fine.
Seriously, I couldn't believe my luck for the past weeks that I didn't even try to argue with the tram inspectors. I just went:" yea yea, give it to me, whatever."
God's sense of humour, I see.

I don't like birthdays.
It makes you feel small and insignificant.
I've been brought up to think that birthday is a special day for me, yet when I walked along the streets, I realised that everyone else is going through their lives like normal. Nothing special is going on. Traffic lights turn green, you walk, you stop.
It's like someone shouting over my ears, saying : YOU'RE NOT SPECIAL! YOU'RE JUST LIKE ANY OTHER TOM. DICK OR HARRY! GO HOME AND SLEEP!
Of course, other than that I got my first fine ever. Something special did happen. Ha. Ha.

I guess I just have to be thankful for what I've got. Yet that's more difficult to do on your birthday. It's tough to appreciate what you already have when it's the day you're expecting something. So over the years, I've learned how to not expect things.

Happy 21st Birthday Harvard.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004


This is hilarious:

Ali G Goes Ivy League 2004
Harvard University Commencement Speech

"Booyakasha - Professor G indahouse aiii. Big shout out de Harvard massiv I iz done a capital 'H', coz Harvard iz a place innit - u see I ain't no ignoranus. Things like 'apple' and 'orange' do not start with a capital letter, unless dey iz at de start of a sentence - but some of you brainboxes probably know dat already innit.Me name be Ali G and me represent de UK. For those of u who didn't study geography de UK is a place over a 100 MILES away from here, de capital of it is? Anyone? Not u geography square! ....yes, it is Liverpool. U iz clever and quite fly if u don't mind me sayin.

First of all, I iz got to say I iz a bit nervous speakin to so many of you - at least me would be if I weren't totally mashed. Normally de only public-speaking I does is to 12 people - and it's well easy all me has to say iz me name and de words 'not guilty......."

Read the rest at www.hbo.com/alig/harvard.html

Mongolian Bartender

Just caught The Manchurian Candidate. Oddly enough, it has nothing to do with Manchurians.
It's the usual conspiracy stuff: A captain has bad dreams after the Kuwait war, suspects he and his team had been brainwashed by an organisation which might be doing the same thing to the candidate running for vice president. It's old school, but it's been a while.
Danzel Washington was good, you know, as an Oscar best actor. But I have to say Meryl Streep did a good job portraying the disfunctional incest mother.
Not much depth in the movie, predictable plots, unsurprising ending. The only philosophical thought was by the scientist concerning Washington's thought.
How'd he know if he's not still in the war and hallucinating the present? That's solipsism for you.
In short, you don't see many movie titles that do not give away the movies' plots. Eg, Titanic is about the Titanic, Polar Express: Polar Express! Team America: well, Team America! So next time to make a different movie, choose a special name, such as The Sinking Baloon, or Exploding Babies, or Take Good Care of Your Camera You Piece of Shit!

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Life after Sydney

It was when we were looking for the location where they shot The Matrix, I realised that that was it. I'll never experience the same thing ever in Sydney. I was going home after that.
I left the Sydney domestic airport listening to Rufus Wainwright's "Hallelujah". Although it's a short trip and I lost my camera, I enjoyed the trip.
Upon landing on Melbourne, I just realised how vast Sydney is looking through the window. And I'll never see Melbourne the same way again. It has never felt so much more like where I belong, yet at the same time I crave for the ever quick pace of Sydney. And then I realised I've gained another experience, grown through another culture.
It seems more like a dream. And now I'm awake. The only proof I've got are the pictures and objects I've bought. It's just bizzare.
Life is not going to be the same anymore.

Saturday, November 20, 2004

Platypus and Tou Fu Fa

Yum Cha today ($18). A really good meal, it was so crowded so we have to sit in a private room. I know you'd think it doesn't make sense, think harder. It will eventually.
We went to the Aquarium with more of X's friends.
I haven't even been to Melbourne's Aquarium. We got the student tickets ($12 instead of $29). I can't really comment on that. I mean, hey, it's an aquarium. We expect to see life forms under the sea, not how to fix an alarm clock.
Had a drink with X in a cafe called BlackBird along Darling Harbour. Took the Stella Artoir tap for $5.80. Talked about how to bring up our kids in the future. It's not a good idea doing that while you're consuming alcohol.
It was raining. We went back, took a shower and we had dinner at surprsie, surprise, BlackBird again. This time with 17 other friends of X. I can actually sense the "who and what the hell is this guy doing here" feeling from most of them. Well, the food was alright. Atmosphere at night is so different.

Friday, November 19, 2004

I feel Manly

What are you thinking when you're let's say, eating an apple? Or an orange? For Jorn Utzon, he thought of building the Sydney Opera House. I see it on the movie all the time. You know, in the movie Independence Day or any other postcards lying around. There's a difference when you're actually there. For me, I feel surreal. As if the whole thing's an image projected from somewhere else.

After having lunch at the Oporto chicken and burger restaurant (whole chicken, jumbo fries and 1.25L Solo for $18.95), we went to Circular Quay. I saw the building in Mission Impossible:2.

The return ticket to Manly Beach cost $15, that's if you're taking the Manly Jet Cat. The normal ferry cost $12, and it takes double the amount of time to get there (30 mins) . After visiting the opera house, we left for Manly Beach.

Manly is a bit, well commercialised. I felt as if I was in Christchurch in NZ. I was amazed to find a Max Berner at the jetty. However, the beach was bigger and longer than Bondi. We saw some people shooting commercial or tv show or something. Walked to an end of the beach. By the time we got back to the quay, it was two hours later.

Had dinner at The Rocks. It's called Pancakes on the Rocks. Met up with X's friends so we sorta shared a tandoori chicken pizza, caesar salad, thai chicken creepe and two pancakes. It was good not because not only because it cost $13, also the restaurant played Lenny Kravitz. Walked along the Circular Quay at night. Took lots of photos, 196 of them.

The Harbour bridge looked awesome.
And also, Sydney has a lunar park. It has the same ugly face with the one in St. Kildas.
Yea yea, i know. We skipped the Royal Botanical Garden.
So what.

Thursday, November 18, 2004

Fried Mars bar and L82

I was humming the opening theme of Baywatch in my head while we were on the bus to Bondi Beach, imagining the likes of David Hasselhoff with his chest hairs running around the beach. Yet Bondi was smaller than I expected. But I wasn't complaining, the weather was good.

We bought lunch at Bondi Surf Seafood. I choose a fried flathead fish with chips that cost $11.80. My friend (let's call him X) had a grilled ocean trout with chips. On top of that we had a fried Mars bar. It was sinful, chocolate bar covered in thick deep fried batter. We sat down in front of a McDonalds eating our lunch, listening to the tune of Sweet Home Alabama. Saw a woman trying to sell her surfboard for $350 dollars coz she's going back to the States.

We walked along Bondi. We've seen women sunbathing nude, took some photos. Again, shame I couldn't put it coz I'm behind a firewall.

We waited for an hour for the bus L82 to go Watsons Bay. In the end we got fed up and took a cab instead. The view was great. There were not many people as it was near evening. We saw a sign that says : Warning! Serious injuries have occured to persons jumping from cliff edge. Jumping from cliff prohibited. Penalty $150. No Shit.
And we wandered into a "nude only in beach" beach.

Met up with my sister for dinner in Superbowl in China Town. Had the usual: sweet and sour pork, kong pow chicken, and assorted tofu. $45.10 for 4 people. Bubble tea for dessert. Sydney got conquered by Happy Cup too.

Tomorrow: Sydeny Opera House, Botanical Garden and Manly Beach.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Hello Darling

My legs were sore, I could feel the sweat running down my back, and then my sandals tripped over the buttons. I went "oh shit!"
I was playing Dance Dance Revolution in the arcade.
It has been a long time. Can't believe I was once good in this shit.

Walking back to IH along George St at 1 am, I walked pass five 7-11's and three McDonalds.
Welcome to Sydney, featuring brands and convenience.

Had teppanyaki for dinner. Walk around Darling Harbour.
It was good. Yet it reminded me of South Bank in Melbourne and Queensland. Not bad a combination.
Took a really awesome photo of the Unilodge building.
Reminded me of a building which Batman would come crashing out with the mad scientist who invented the time machine.
Shame I couldn't share it coz I'm behind proxy.

Looking forward to day 3: Bondi Beach.

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Sydney - Day 2

That's it. I can kiss my cameras good bye.
Yes, I have contacted the lost and found people.

And they need seven working days to actually report a lost item.
So no, no camera for the entire trip here.
And everything I see reminded me of my camera.
Like the signs around the city that say: " please keep your personal belongings close to you when you are travellling."
And the fact that the foyer of IH Sydney is full of photographs.
And posters that say: " On Sale: SLR Cameras, CHEAP!"

Surprisingly, my parents took it quite well.
My father said I should be careful next time and try to enjoy my trip without a camera.
My mom said what done is done, don't worry too much about it.
I think they are hiring ninjas to assasinate me anytime now.

Apart from visiting Sydney's Kinokuniya, buying some pirated DVD's and eating some taiwanese dinner, I haven't seen much yet.
Coz my good friend here's been spending the whole 24 hours editing their I-Night video.
Plus I'm not really in the mood for sightseeing without my camera.
Tomorrow will be a better day.
I'll just spend the rest of the day writing and sketching and reading my Murakami book.
And mourn over my lost camera.

Now the question: Should I get a digital SLR next?

Monday, November 15, 2004


First day in Sydney, and I've lost my camera.
To be precise, two cameras, two lenses, three films, and the bag all together.
I'm all left with a freakin tripod.
I hate Sydney already.
All because of a can of Coke.
I was at a train stop. I haven't been eating for the whole day so I figured I need a refreshment.
After buying the Coke, I notice the train arriving and I rushed towards it.
The guy was rushing all the passengers in and well, I was one of them.
It was then I realised the camera bag was still on the bench.
When I got back to the same terminal, It was alraedy gone.
Now I'm just hoping someone saw it and took it to the lost and found or something.
Sydney, day one.

Saturday, November 13, 2004

I'm glad I felt the wind

I've red a report on some other blogs that Tara Reid exposed her breasts to the public during Sean Combs AKA P.Diddy's birthday bash. Apparently her left strap fell down and, check this out, she had no idea and kept smiling to the camera until her PR manager ran up and pulled her dress up.

Geez, how drunk or stoned do you need to be to NOT realise your dress was falling down and you are exposing your BREASTS to the the whole camera crew? And the worst part is, scars of breast transplant could be seen around her aroula.

I don't know, somehow I think it is all intentional. Check out all the celebrity scandals, all the 'accidental' screw ups and home made videos, I mean, this year is like the year of celebrity fuck ups. And last time I heard Paris Hilton's sex tape is now an actual retail DVD and she sort of gets some comission out of each DVD sold. WTF???

This world is truly screwed up. I can imagine some dumb girl in the states is now planning in her diary. Things to do:
1) get on American Idol/ Survivor Pulau Ketam/ Big Brother/ Get born filthy rich
2) get famous
3) star in some crap advertisements
4) have LOTS of sex on video
5) wait till the public forgets about you
6) release the sex tapes
7) make money

Yeah. And celebrities are suppose to be the 'role models' of the public. A quote from Love Actually: " Kids, don't do drugs. Be a rockstar and you get them for free." Get the fuck out of here. No wonder everyone is divorcing. Why are we paying so much for them to entertain us anyway? They just stand there and sing. Look, if people don't buy records and go to their concerts, they will not have jobs. People who deserves actual money, eg. teachers, police men, fire fighters, 7-11 cashiers get paid jack shit.

Here's the sad part. We pay more attention to these people than the people who are actually around us and need attention. We know they're sort of fictional, yet we follow what they wear, what they drive, what they eat. Like shit, we even know when their dresses are falling off. How sad is this... I blame the media. We don't need entertainment. The media made us think smaller than the celebrities. So we are not getting famous or rich or powerful, yet I don't think worshipping some plastic boobs surgery actress will make us feel any better. You know it sucks when your nipple can't even feel the change of wind. I feel so sorry for her.

UPDATE: There's even a video of the incident now. Man...

Monday, November 08, 2004

Crazy Ang Mo's...

Here are some illegal sex acts in the foreign white countries. Don't ask me how I came about them, it's a long story...

1. In Newcastle (WY), it is illegal for couples to have sex while standing inside a store's walk-in meat freezer.
2. In Halethorpe (MD), it is illegal to kiss for more than ONE second.
3. In Connorsville (WI), it is illegal for a man to shoot off a gun while his female partner has an orgasm.
4. In London, it is illegal to have sex on a parked motorcycle.
5. In Romboch (VA), it is illegal to engage in sexual activities with the lights ON.
6. In hotels in Sioux Falls (SD), every room is required to have twin beds. The beds must be in minimum of TWO feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it is illegal to make love on the floor between the beds.
7. In Detroit (MI), it is illegal for couples to make love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property.
8. In Ames (IA), it is illegal for a husband to take more than THREE gulps of beer while lying in bed with his wife - or holding her in his arms.
9. In Washington (DC), the only acceptable sexual position is the missionary position.
10. In Los Angeles (CA), a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can't be wider than TWO inches, unless he has his wife's consent to beat her with a wider strap.
11. In Alexandria (MN), no man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlics, onions or sardines on his breath. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he has to brush his teeth.
12. In Columbus (GA), it is illegal to sit on one's porch in an indecent position.
13. In Minneapolis (MN), it is illegal to molest vegetation (such as using them as sexual tools).

All I can say is, the world sure is a screwed up place. I mean, what kind of a government would actually sit down and pass the law on sexual acts? " Hmm, I pity the women who had to smell their husbands' bad breath while having sex, let's make a law out of it." Or, "Hey, carrots and eggplants have feelings too, I don't think they'd appreciate it to get stuffed into homo sepians."

This is eye-opening, as well as brain cells-killing.

Friday, November 05, 2004

The man with the machine gun.

Final Fantasy X-2 sucks.

Really. Although I spent 30 hours finishing it, the whole game design is crap. There's no additional enhancement of the graphics, probably only a handful of new characters were created, you explore the same places in the game, even the bosses were past aeons, final boss was lame, even Ultima Weapon is now only a random encountered enemy. The scripts were terrible ("Gullwings, go!"??), voices are not in sync, and worst of all, Nobuo Uematsu wasn't the composer for the soundtrack. FFX doesn't deserve a sequel more than FF7, they just want something easy to do so that they could make more money out of the "Final Fantasy" franchise.

Ok, for non game players, that last paragraph didn't make sense. Let's just stick to this: I'm not happy about a video game titled Final Fantasy X-2.

Yet since I'm on holiday now, I'm alright with it. I need video games to kill time anyway.

What I'm really pissed off about is that Nobuo Uematsu held a concert in Sydney a week ago. He didn't bother coming to Melbourne. WTF? Hey, Melbourne is the more cultured city, why? WHY??! WHYYYYYYY!!!??? Damn you who went to the concert, you know who you are!

It's crazy how a person can be so obssesed on non-existence culture huh? Well, I guess that's how the world works. Chanel spent 12 million dollars making a 60 seconds TVC staring Nicole Kidman, now that's not superficial at all. Haha. Hmm.

Monday, November 01, 2004

Mega Flare and the long silver sword.

After playing Final Fantasy X-2 for twenty hours in a week's time, I finally admit that video games aren't real. So I'm slow, sue me. I don't know, I just feel cheated. Like how the characthers' hair would be the same after a huge boss fight. Or, how the characters never go to the loo. Or they can fall from 100 ft high and survive. That's not how the real world works. And game makers always claim to be making the most "realistic" games ever. Get the hell out of here.

Yet video games do bring back memories. I can never forget Final Fantasy 7, the first RPG I've played. Sephiroth is much cooler than the pussy main character Cloud. And who could forget the summons like Bahamut, which is voted for best summon ever (although in FFX it looked like a mutated bird)? In fact, they are so cool that it's appearing in the sequel movie FFVII: Advent Children, both Sephiroth and Bahamut.

Guys born in the 80's, y'all remember Street Fighter 2. The one where we said "Bogan" instead of "Hadoken", " Ho-liu-gen" instead of "Shinryuken", "Ah-lick-goo" insted of "Sonic Boom"... If you do not understand what I'm talking about, you're either not borned in the 80's or you're not a guy. Or maybe you just missed out one of the best pop culture in our lives.

As superficial as they can be, video games are a huge part of my life. I'm just feeling sad that they're fading away and I'm losing touch. I need to grow up. I need to be interested in politics and shit now. Don't you just hate that feeling?